Courtroom Couture

If you have to be in court, have an important meeting, big presentation, or just need to look fiercely FABULOUS for work, then you should consider pairing the Strenesse Lightweight Wool Dress with the Strenesse Stretch Wool Tweed Jacket, as pictured below.

The piping on the jacket draws attention to the tailoring which shapes the jack in a way that flatters the figure.

If you choose to wear the Strenesse Lightweight Wool Dress without the jacket you'll still look FAB-U-LOUS!

The bodice is fitted and below there is horiztonal panels constructed in order to create interest.

Both pieces are available from Nordstrom. The dress normally retails for $780.00 while the jacket normally retails for $870.00, but with the Nordstrom Annual Sale (!!!) you can get the dress for $429.00 and the jacket for $479.00.

If you are interested, you better get there soon-- the sale ends August 3, 2009 and after that prices go back to the regular retail prices. (Read: HURRY!)

Dating 101

Workplace Dating - The Do's and Don'ts - Part 1

Finding yourself single after college is increasingly hard-- not only are your girlfriends off doing their own fabulous things, but your dating pool as significantly dwindled down to slim pickin's. You are no longer surrounded by your peers-- your usual routine of Tuesday night dates has been replaced with you, the work you didn't finish from the day, and the TV going off in the background for white noise.

A lot of magazines targeted for women recommend inter-office dating, usually showcased with a makeout scene by the filing cabinets. (Getting out into the "real world," we begin to wonder, "Who really works in a place like that?!)

B & L want you to be forewarned before you slide the hottie in the cube next to you your number on a post-it: You've worked hard for four years building your education and now want to maintain your professional integrity that you're building, from the bottom of the totem poll on up!

If your office is small, B & L recommend staying away from dating any one. The same applies if you have a large company and you and potential Mr. Right Now work in the same department. Sure, right now all you can do is gaze over and think how cute he looks in his khakis and Lacoste polo and wonder how anything could possible go wrong...la de dah, off in dream land.

::Shake, shake:: Wake up!

Save yourself awkwardness of seeing that person every day after things sour! (And they will likely sour.¹) Think: Do you really want to overhear his conversation he's definitely going to have about his wild night at such-and-such club, name dropping all the people he saw, and the girl he went home with?²

Let us answer this for you: "No." Yes, you could do the same³, but you're way past playing those games. Just take our advice and don't get involved in the first place.

Also, suppose you were to date, what is your conversation going to centralize around? How your days were? You already know -- you were there for it all!

Now, this does not mean you should not socialize with your co-workers. Going out after work for drinks and/or appetizers is always recommended. It is good for team morale and networking. Just do NOT be the girl that has one too many drinks or eats like she hasn't seen food in days. Pace yourself. The same rule applies to any company outing.

If you are dating someone in your office, keep work at work, and your relationship outside of the office doors. Don't let the argument you had last night ruin your work performance during the day. Call your girlfriend at lunch if you need to vent.

And, most importantly, do not get caught trying to hook up anywhere around or near the office! This includes⁴:

> no footsie under the table;

> no accidental hand grazing at the table;

> no quickies in the supply room;

> no bum grabs as he walks by; and

> no sitting on his lap (even if the door is closed!).

Instead of trying to find a date at work, ask your friends if they know anyone or try your hand at one of the online dating sites.⁵

So, remember-- the workplace is just that: a place for work. Be extra careful when you mix work and your social life. The lines can become very blurry and you don't want to be out of a relationship and your job.

---

1. What? L is a bit of a pessimist when it comes to relationships!

2. Most likely made up.

3. a la Cher Horowitz in the classic movie Clueless, sending yourself a gorgeous flower arrangement (or two!), dark European chocolates, and dropping your pen by his cube so he can check out your "stems."

4. But is not limited to.

5. MySpace not included. Creepy.

Courtroom Couture

Coco Chanel once said: "A girl should be two things: classy and fabulous."

That applies whether you are in the boardroom, courtroom, or if you are at a function for work. If it's an event that requires formal dress attire, there are likely several problems that need to be resolved before attending.

The obvious ones: What to wear? What shoes would go? How to do your hair and makeup?

But one problem that we ladies tend to put on hold until later is finding a handbag to go with your outfit. Well, Chanel's Fall/Winter 2009-2010 Pre-Collection takes care of that!

Two specifically delicious clutches jump out:

The Satin Quilted Clutch with Strassed CC (top) and the Pleated Calfskin Clutch with Sparkling Strassed Closure (bottom) both pictured below.



Both clutches are classy, fabulous and timeless pieces. An extra bonus is that they are both neutrals so they will go with numerous outfits: for your function coming up and others through the season!

Thirsty Thursday

Shannon's Pearl Harbor

L's girl friend, Shannon, taught her this twist on a classic drink. Malibu Rum is substituted instead of vodka, and makes for a perfect summer drink!

Ingredients:

1 oz Malibu Rum

1/2 oz Midori melon liqueur

5 oz Pineapple Juice

cherry

pineapple wedge

Instructions:

Pour the Malibu and Midori in a highball glass over ice.

Fill with the pineapple juice.

Garnish with a maraschino cherry and a pineapple wedge on a cocktail skewer.

Cheers!

Water Cooler

Return of the Bicyclist

To recap: B & L posted a Water Cooler regarding a bicyclist being paintballed by a motorist. The lesson: "while bicyclists can be annoying to motorists, motorists can be down right dangerous to bicyclists."

But that doesn't mean bicyclists cannot put a motorist in a somewhat dangerous position. Case in point: C, an intern at B's office, was verbally abused by a bicyclist! Want to the deets? Keep reading!

C was driving down the main road in her home town - two lanes, minding her own business. Then she came upon a bicyclist. A bicyclist that was riding his bike in the middle of the road - right in between the two lanes, not off to the side!

Not wanting to get close to the bicyclist, and ready to be on her way, C hooks once, and tries to have the bicyclist move to the side so she can safely pass by. Unfortunately for C, the bicyclist does not move. He keeps peddling down the middle of the road!

So, instead of keeping a steady 15 mph behind him, she passes him, praying that there won't be any oncoming cars headed her way. She is ahead of the bicyclist! But, C's luck does not stay that way for long.

C approaches a four-way intersection and like a polite, law-abiding motorist, she stops. The bicyclist catches up and takes advantage of C's stopped car and proceeds to bang on her window! He demands for her to get out of her car so that he can continue to berate her outside the safety of her vehicle. She looks at him like he is a crazy person, and mouths the word "no," over and over. He threatens to call the police, while he continues to bang on her window, if she does not get out. She, of course, continues to say no,¹ desperately hoping there's a clear so she can speed away from him!

So, when she gets a chance to go through the intersection, she does while the bicyclist pulls off to the side of the road to call the cops on poor petite C!

...and now we shall have to update our lesson to include a warning that bicyclists may become abusive!

---

1. Come on! Like you would actually get out of the car.

Courtroom Couture

L's constantly in search of a chic bag to tote around the daily essentials: going from downtown to the office to class at night-- something to handle the project she's working on at her grown up job, class notes from the lecture, and of course, the latest issue of Vogue¹.

Enter: the iconic Mulberry Bayswater².

Reinvented season after season, the Fall/Winter 2009 collection features luxurious ostrich skin, in cerise (pictured below), rouge nior, emerald, and coral.³

The ostrich Bayswater retails for $4,000.00. (If only we had the lawyer salary NOW!) The dimensions would solve the ageless "carryall" dilema: 10.5" x 14.25" x 6.5": Perfect.

Another option that will likely leave you salivating is the Bayswater in cerise hair calf leather⁴ which would complete your Elle Woods'-esque wardrobe, for less of a hit to the (designer) wallet, for only $1,395.00.

Both options add a punch to any outfit you wear and will definitely make heads turn.

---

1. Still "The Bible."

2. L is really developing a strong love for British luxury brands, with fall and winter having been synonymous with Burberry.
3. Plenty of options to choose from - what more could you ask for?

4. L just wants to pet it!

Hot Mess or Fashion Success?

A clutch that is designed to be an exact replica of the Eiffel Tower: "Hot Mess!"

Below is the Timmy Woods 'Eiffel Tower' Limited Edition Clutch. Once the "It" bag for 2008, largely due to the exposure it received as Carrie Bradshaw sported it in "Sex & the City: The Movie," the clutch is still being marketed and sold across the web.

We don't know what is worse: Selling a clutch that actually looks like the Eiffel Tower, or, the fact that someone is bound to actually buy such the thing when it actually costs $450.00, or, the fact that someone thought this would look good.

It might be okay for a child¹ to have this purse in order to play dress up when she wants a purse to be like a "big girl;" however, the fact that this is being marketed and sold to adults is just plain wrong!

It should also be noted that just because Carrie Bradshaw's version was covered in Swarovski crystals in the movie, it doesn't mean it was right!²

---

1. It may be okay if it was NOT $450.00!

2. For only $3,000.00 that, too, can be yours!

Loves It, Hates It

Awkward Family Photos: "Loves It!"

Ever look at a family photo and think "OMG. That's so awkward." Or, maybe the photo just made you die of laughter because everyone looks ridiculous in it?

If you answered "yes," then Awkward Family Photos is for you. It's a website where people submit their family photos or a photo of themselves that is A-W-K-W-A-R-D!

B's personal favorite is the Awkward Solo Photo: Roman Shade.

Check it out for a great laugh and maybe it will make you feel better about your family photos!

Happy Monday!

Lifestyle

Recently, L stumbled across this checklist on-line: 20 Things Women Should Do Before The Age of 25.

Here is the list of the 20 things women should do before the age of 25 and getting married. So for younger women out there, this is a good list and pretty much right on. And for you guys that like dating younger women, you should always run through this checklist:

1. Live by herself for at least a year.
2. Live with someone else for at least a year.
3. Recover from a broken heart.
4. Have a vacation fling.
5. Take a road-trip with a group of girlfriends.
6. Relish sleeping in a queen-sized bed by herself.
7. Get her finances in order.
8. Learn to love her body.
9. Have sex with at least one person she’d never want to marry (or introduce to mom).
10. Find reliable birth control.
11. Pay off as much credit card debt and student loans as possible.
12. Spend way too much on a something frivolous.
13. Exorcise all past relationship demons.
14. Travel somewhere exotic.
15. Establish a strong circle of friends.
16. Forgive her parents for not being perfect.
17. Have at least one night she can’t quite remember.
18. Experience some really bad first dates.
19. Find hobbies that fulfill her.
20. Celebrate her 25th birthday!

L has 9 months to knock a lot of these off the list¹. For certain numbers one and two shall not be happening. Before reading this, her "before 25" list looked a little something like this:

• Go on another girls vacation..to Vegas! or someplace equally as exciting. However, this time, we're totally staying at a Four Seasons-type resort and not roughing it without hot water and 24/7 concierge. No.Thank.You. (LP, I know you have my back on this one!!)
• Buy self Louie bag for 25th b-day because it's a milestone.
• Learn to speak Italian.

She has successfully "crossed off" the following from her own working list:

• Working a real, grown up job;²
• Quitting said grown up job after 2+ years to go to law school.

And, has added a "To Do Before the Age of 30" working list:

• Pass the Bar!
• Own real estate. Preferably something cute with exposed brick. Loves it.

Like L, B has a way to go with this list - although that won't stop her from trying! Realistically 1 and 2 won't be "crossed off" by the time she's 25, maybe by the time she's 30? Here's to hoping! At least she has some things checked off from her own list³:

• Live in a foreign country. Granted it was only a few months but that still counts, rights?
• Go on a road trip. B's been blessed and has gone on two thus far with some amazing girls!
  

What are your goals and aspirations? Have you completed anything major that deserves a "snaps!"? Let us know!

---

1. I guess some of it could be possible. I mean, women carry babies to term in the same amount of time...

2. Complete with company BlackBerry and corporate AmEx. (And, refusal to wear the Bluetooth headset.)
3. B didn't really have a list she just thought of things she experienced to say she "crossed off". Trust though, B will be putting together a list now and she already has two things "crossed off"!

Water Cooler

Setting: L is at the tanning salon, waiting patiently for the big hand on the clock to go from the 8 to the 9. Ten minutes left and she can get out of this oven. The temperature has not gone below 80 degrees all day-- with the air conditioner on. Thank goodness for a little plastic $10 fan, likely from Target.¹

L is upstairs cleaning the one of the bedrooms, the phone rings. Lucky for her, she brought the cordless with her upstairs, as she just finished chatting with the Boss-man.

Good little L, that multi-tasker. (Someone ought to give her a raise!)

"Good Afterno--" she gets cut off, and there is no one on the other end.

She makes her way downstairs. Mid-flight, the phone rings again.

"Good Afternoon, Tanning Salon on the West Side," she says as she rounds the corner.

There leaning over the front desk, waiting, is a gentleman. This particular gentleman was on his cell phone. Normally, that would be fine but then the man sees L, flips his cell closed, and replies, "Oh. There you are."

Really? You really just called me from the front desk? Twice? And actually hung up on me the first time? I wasn't gone for more than two minutes and you certainly did not pull into the parking lot before I went upstairs. Excuse me, sir, for not being here, ready to wait on you when you needed it. Didn't realize your tan was that important.²

L glared at him, her inside thoughts clearly making it known through the stare, and politely asked him his last name, and tanned him.

Out of sight out of mind.

Lesson: In places where you frequent often, knowing fully well that there is only one person working, and clearly see her belongings³ on the front desk, be patient!

---

1. A Godsend!
2. And, he wasn't even a guido!

3. Belongings being Outlines and Dolce glasses, trying to study here!!

Thirsty Thursday

For everyone who needs a little luck today, whether it's a big presentation at work or a final for your summer course, this one is for you!

Enjoy.

LADY LUCK

Ingredients:

1 oz Stoli Razberi Vodka
1 oz Malibu Coconut Rum
1 oz Captain Morgan Spiced Rum
1/2 oz Midori Melon Liqueur
1/2 oz Amaretto Almond Liqueur
1 1/2 oz Cranberry Juice
1 1/2 oz Orange Juice
1 1/2 oz Pineapple Juice
2 dashes Rose's Grenadine Syrup

Instructions:

Pour Stoli Razberi, Malibu, Captain Morgan, Midori, and Amaretto into a mixing tin.

Add a splash of sour mix, equal parts of pineapple juice, orange juice, and cranberry juice.

Shake well.

Fill glass with ice and strain and mix into it.

Settle grenadine down the side of the glass and garnish with two cherries and a slice of orange.

Don't forget to drink responsibly.

Receipe is taken from drinksmixer.com

Good Luck

Good Luck to everyone taking Tricky Dicky's Final

Love
B & L

What were they thinking?

We've all stressed out before a major presentation, especially before our 1L Oral Arguments. (Sometimes it feels like you're being thrown in the deep end, without your "Finding Nemo" swimmies on your arms.)

Well, give your nerves a rest and remember that even the pro's slip up sometimes. The following quotes are from a book called Disorder in the Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

Enjoy! (And, remember: you should always be able to laugh at yourself!)

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, 'Where am I, Cathy?'
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!

---

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

---

ATTORNEY:: Are you sexually active?

WITNESS: No, I just lie there.

---

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?

WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?

---

ATTORNEY: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
WITNESS: We both do.
ATTORNEY: Voodoo?
WITNESS: We do.
ATTORNEY: You do?
WITNESS: Yes, voodoo.

---

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

---

ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He's twenty, much like your IQ.

---

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Are you shitting me?

---

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Getting laid.

---

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?

---

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
WITNESS: Take a guess.

---

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?
WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.
ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?
WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town, I'm going with male.

---

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

---

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight.

---

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
WITNESS: Oral.

---

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.

---

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?

---

And the best for last:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No..
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Water Cooler

Setting: B is on break with another intern at one of her college internships when the topic of bicyclists came up.

Now, we have all had at least one experience with a bicyclist-- either in our way or not waiting at a red light, or instead, riding their bikes into the middle of the intersection and oncoming traffic making every motorist stop or yield to them because, after all, who really wants to hit the person on the bike?

Well it just so happens that the other intern has a friend that used to be a bicyclist. B picks up the on the wording, "used to be," and automatically wonders what happened. So, she asks. The other interns tells her the story:

"Well, she was riding her bike one day when a car pulled up beside her. The kids in the car took out a paintball gun and started shooting paintballs at her. She came home covered in them and had bruises from them too."

Lesson: While bicyclists can be annoying to motorist, motorists can be down right dangerous to bicyclists.

Frugal is the New Black

B & L regularly hit up Starbucks before class, needing that espresso running through our insides to keep us alert (some days it is needed more often than others!).

Well, we are happy to announce that our latte hot spot is offering a perk for all you early risers!

Starbucks has revamped their menu, taking out the artificial flavorings and high fructose corn syrup and, to celebrate the simpler menu, is offering a FREE pastry from opening until 10:30am tomorrow, July 21st, 2009 (while supplies last) with the purchase of any beverage.

Now we ask you, Recessionistas, what tastes better than FREE?

Click below to print your invitation:

Free Pastry

Or, open this page on your mobile device and show your barista:
Free Pastry

Pastries included in the offer are: Muffins, Scones, Bagels, Croissants, Rolls, Breads, Pound Cakes, Morning Bun, Coffeecakes, Cheese Danish, Apple Fritter, Doughnuts, Tarts, Pies, Gluten Free Orange Valencia Cake, Tropical Paradise Bar.

Mmmmmmm. Hungry now?

(Also, L really wants the cute Mini Starbucks Card that goes on your key ring. Loves it!)

Finals Week

Hi Friends,

It's dreaded finals week for our Summer Session, so we will be keeping to one post per day this week. But don't worry, of course they'll be quality like you've come to expect from Counsel Confidential!

Also, we love your comments! Keep them coming and always feel free to e-mail us with questions or suggestions on what you would like to see here on the blog!

xoxo

B & L

What was I thinking?

It's a weekday morning. B is trying to get ready for work. All she has left to do is straighten her hair and do her makeup (don't want it melting off before the day even started!). She picked up the plug, stuck it into the outlet, and attempted to turn on her straightener. To her dismay, it doesn't turn on. So she begins to fiddle. She pushes the reset button on the straightener, the reset button the outlet (several times; separately and together). None of her attempts work, so she doesn't give up and keeps fiddling, after all she's a "Miss Independent" she can totally figure this out.

10 minutes later.....

B looks at the outlet wondering what exactly she could possibly missing, looks at the straightener, looks down and realizes her straightener is NOT even plugged in! She spent all that time thinking her straightener would not turn on when it was plugged in never realizing that it was her hairdryer she plugged in.

B does her hair, makeup and goes to work.

Later that afternoon...

B comes home before she jests off to class. She looks at her hair and notices her hair needs a little touch up. She picks up the plug and puts it into the outlet and attempts to turn on the straightener. It doesn't turn on.

A few minutes later...

B looks down and says out loud: "OMG What was I thinking? I did it again!! I plugged in my hairdryer?"

Lesson: Learn from your mistakes and if you don't...laugh when you make the same one again.

Dating 101

Have you ever wondered how could you figure out if the someone of the opposite sex was into you?

Well B & L have definitely wondered that. It would be great if there were some signs that you could use to tell if they're turned off or on. So here are 10 signs that can you can use to help you figure out if he/she is into you.

1. He/She calls for no reason
2. He/She actively seeks your company.
3. He/She makes time for you in his/her life.
4. His/Her friends know about you.
5. He/She takes the time to get to know your friends.
6. He/She maintains eye contact.
7. He/She leans in while you are talking.
8. He/She listens.
9. He/She regularly touches you.
10.He/She takes interest in your interests.

If you want more information click here to check out the article.

Thirsty Thursday

Now, we're guessing a lot of you are probably detoxing after the 4th (and Birthday!) celebrations, so this week B & L are providing you with a non-alcoholic bev that will leave you feeling fabulous!

Ruby Sipper Cooler

Ingredients:

1/2 cup fresh raspberries

1/2 cup fresh strawberries

1/2 cup cranberry juice

1 cup frozen strawberries

1 frozen banana, cut into chunks

Instructions:

Combine the raspberries and the fresh strawberries in a blender with the cranberry juice.

Blend to a puree (about one minute).

Add the frozen strawberries and banana chunks.

Blend until smooth (about one minute longer).

Pour into your favorite glass and share with a friend! Serves two.

Garnish with a fresh strawberry on the rim and a dollop of whipped cream on the top if you feel like indulging.

Enjoy!

Recipe from InnerSelf.com.

Loves It, Hates It

The thought of Jon Gosselin working with Christian Audigier: "Hates It!"

While L was certainly glad that the trash mags took a break from reporting on the Gosselin family breakdown¹, covering the dramz behind MJ's death, Gisele's (unconfirmed) baby bump, J.Simpson's breakup (ugh!), she is not pleased to read the reports of Jon Gosselin working with gaudy t-shirt designer Christian Audigier for a new children's clothing line.

Photo courtesy of DonEdHardy.com.

Now, don't get me wrong. I love Christian Audigier as much as the orange-skinned, Sonic the Hedgehog style blowout sporting Guido next to me, but why would he think this is a good idea?²

He's gifted the Gosselin family other Ed Hardy merchandise, but Jon is the only one that has been photographed wearing it. And that was only recently, noted in his NY apartment search at the Trump Towers. Maybe this is because Jon clearly had no style during the Jon and Kate episodes, not even "cubicle chic!"

What makes Jon Gosselin so appealing that Mr. Audigier would want his help in starting a child-friendly clothing line? The fact that Jon is having a "mid-life crisis" at 32? Or maybe it was the fact that his face was plastered all over US Weekly, Star, etc. for how many weeks straight?

Ugh, he looks like such a phoney DBag. (I just want to rip those plastic sunglasses off his douchey face and remind him that he has EIGHT children to take care of!)

And "dating" a 22 year-old ex-convict? Sounds like a huge publicity stunt³...but enough of my ramblings: I'm off to WalMart to go pick up some Ed Hardy school supplies.⁴

---

1. "Doing everything for the children," my ass! You're both greedy!

2. Has Crystal Rock even taken off? Definitely not around New England or the Tri-State.

3. They were photographed holding hands. No other PDA? Hmmmm.

4. I hear all the DBags in training have them!

Loves It, Hates It

Guys that act like DBags: "Hates It!"

You all must know at least one girl in your clique who seems to be attracted to the DBs.

It's like the Sex and the City episode "Man, Myth" where Miranda meets Steve (the bartender) for the first time and has a one night stand, Big helps Carrie save face with her friends after she went on that her relationship was "different" the second time around (but when Big was suppose to go out with Carrie and the girls, he got cold feet yet still managed to show up at the nick of time at Denial) and Samantha goes out with that really old guy.

There are a ton of girls out there attracted to DBs. So if they are DBs, why are we so attracted to them?

This episode got me thinking: the answer was right there on my television. You want to be that girl that changes the DBs ways, that way you can be the friend of a friend of a friend who once dated this huge DB, but when faced with the decision of either losing you or changing his DB ways, he gladly choose you. In the end of the story you became the new Myth - "the Changer of DBags."

Unfortunately, while we all want to feel like there is someone out there that wants us so badly or loves us so much he/she would be willing to change, sometimes you have to make a hard decision, drop the DB and go with the nice guy or stay with the DB and have a possibility of getting on the MTV reality show "Is She Really Dating Him?"

The Usual Suspects

The Hotties

While law school may have many similarities to the 8th grade, there are definitely more attractive men then there were in middle school, which can be both positive and negative.

On the positive side: when the lecture gets boring, or if you are single, there is scenery for you to look at!

When there is a positive there is usually a negative, and on the negative side: there is scenery for you to look at and it can become a distraction from that lecture you are paying money to listen to.

Usually, The Hotties will catch your attention the first class. There can also be a couple "surprise hotties" that you experience as class continues, trust B has definitely experienced the surprise hotties. There are also the "diamond in the rough hottie." Those are the guys that you don't really notice at first, but that one class you do you are so thankful you came that day.

So while you sit in that class trying to pay attention remember to enjoy a moment or two¹ to look around and enjoy all the hotties in your class but don't let yourself become too distracted!²

Enjoy!

---

1. Or in B & L cases, ten or fifteen moments!

2. They just look so cute in their suits!!

The Usual Suspects

Update: B & L had to search for new seats today because The Webstalker stole our usual spot. Obv. The Webstalker, in his online activities, did not migrate on over to "Counsel Confidential" today to learn. Ugh.

Snaps!

L would like to extend an ENORMOUS CONGRATULATIONS to her bestie, S, for passing the F.E.!!!!

Snaps! for a job well done!

xoxo

The Usual Suspects

The Webstalker

Stadium style seating makes pinpointing The Webstalker much easier, but so much harder to ignore him/her. You will tend to find The Webstalker following the happenings of others on Facebook, MySpace, Twitter, LinkedIn, and any (and all!) other social networking websites. Sometimes you may even find the webstalker on Google Maps - taking the lurking up to a whole new level - looking up addresses, and zooming in on houses.¹

While The Webstalker is doing this, you cannot help but keep your eyes glued to whatever he/she is doing and wondering who the webstalker will look up next.

If you sit in the back (like B & L) be careful! The Webstalkers will tend to migrate to the back of the classroom, just in case the professor likes to wander around the classroom to discover why a student's face is glued to the computer screen, that way the webstalker won't get caught, but be forewarned: you might be out of a seat!²

---

1. Yea. We totally caught you, creeper!
2. Now B & L have to hurry to class to claim their seats!!

Loves It, Hates It

Logging onto Facebook and getting a homepage full of Twitter updates from someone you only went to high school with: "Hates It!"

Yup. Every single time L logs in to get going on a little something she like to call "procrastination" and "daily webstalking," she get an eyefull of so-and-so's daily activities, imported from his Twitter account.

As she's feeling rather sassy as the end of the summer semester nears, and felt it was best to let her feelings out in writing. So she posted this little ditty to his wall:

---

Dear [Twitter'ed],

I think I know more about you now (via your hourly twitter updates) than I did in high school.

Thanks for letting all 737 of your friends keep a tab on you every time we log into FBook.

I hope your internet is up and working (?or do I...? ha ha) and good luck with all your meetings and dance offs, you busy boy.

Best,
L

---

Glad he saw the humor, and posted this back!

---

Dear L,

We here at [His Real First & Last Name] are always glad to read your valued feedback, and are happy that you find your service so useful.

In the event of an internet outage, our backup systems will surely post information about it. The data rate may be considerably lower, but we will continue our mission to record daily mundane activities.

Thanks for your patronage!

---

Update: The Twitter updates have not stopped! L suggested he start to post to MyLifeIsAverage.com.

Hot Mess or Fashion Success?

Wow. No description necessary: "Hot Mess!"

Sadly, this was posted as someone's default picture. We all know default pictures on any social networking site are usually the best one that you have of yourself: you know, ten pounds lighter, perfect skin, hair did.

Can someone please explain what on Earth is going on here????

B & L had a little discussion about this picture.

Minus the left leg almost being ripped to shreds, L thought you could maybe just get rid of the equally busy shirt and pair a neutral t-shirt with it, problem solved. The girl looks a little younger (noted from her orange glow), and obviously has the confidence to wear the two pieces together, she might be able to pull it off the jeans if she toned it down.

B thought otherwise. B yelled at L and laughed in her face. Told her, "no! It's all wrong! HA HA HA" (Yea, she laughed for a good thirty seconds.) Although she would say it was probably more like 10 seconds. After she finished laughing she turned to L and said "Those pants should never be worn. Shirt is okay if she wore the right pants but the pants are not only ripped they have bleach marks all over them! That's a bad combination no matter who is wearing them."

Moral of the story: Wear one trend at a time. Do not go overboard. Do not buy jeans that have both tears and bleach markings. When in doubt, get an honest opinion from your friends.

We hope this girl stayed in the house and her friends set her straight after the pic was snapped!

What were they thinking?

Normally this would be about either B or L doing something ridiculous, otherwise we generally won't be it up, however, this is too good so we made an exception!

As mentioned, it was recently B's birthday. So, her family took her out to a nice restaurant to celebrate. Her mother thought it would be great to have them surprise her with a birthday cake. So, her mother told the restaurant B's name and they said it would be no problem. What the restaurant failed to note is that B and her mom share the same name.

When it came time to dessert, the waiter brought out the cake and started to sing "Happy Birthday." However, instead of giving the cake to B, he put the cake down in front of her mother and sang "Happy Birthday" to her.

The waiter had no idea why the whole table had erupted with laughter. So they looked at B and her family and turned away. After they turned around her mom handed B the cake and everyone chuckled a little bit more.

Loves It, Hates It

Random quotes that makes you laugh: "Loves It!"

Have you ever heard something so random that made you crack up with laughter?

When you are having a long day or bad day or day that just needs some laughter added to it these random quotes seem to make everything better.

Case in point: B randomly got an email from her friend T (Shout out to T!) and it was full of random quotes. Well B was having one of those days where she needed a good laugh, so she read this email and just cracked up laughing to some of the random quotes.

Below are some of the quotes that we're sure you can relate to:

"Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public, I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the Red Ryder BB gun that I always wanted. 546 pictures? Don't mind if I do!"

"I’m pretty sure I get 'self beer goggles'. The more beers I drink, the hotter I appear in the mirror. Sad downfall to reality: when I see those Facebook photos of the previous night and realize how awful I actually look when wasted."

"Beware your drunken inner-entrepreneur. While nursing a hangover, I found my handwriting on a wadded up bar napkin that simply read, New Restaurant Idea: Date Crepe! I can't decide if I should be more worried about the concept, or the fact that I added an exclamation point."

B & L love a good laugh, so a random quote or something that is so ridiculous that makes one burst out laughing is a definite "Loves It!"

Dating 101

One mistake we women make is going out with our friends with the hopes of finding a man.

Definite "no, no!"

If you want to find a man, you want to make yourself approachable. Unfortunately, the quality males probably won't find you approachable if you are there with a pack of your friends. The guy could be scared, after all they may be timid,¹ and what timid quality guy wants to take a chance of being rejected in front of a group of women?

You may be thinking, "that's great B & L what should we do instead?" Well, you can go to the bar area during the early part of the night. Order some apps, bring a book (and not one of those books that only females will get but one that a guy might actually read or be interested in), look like you are busy. You are by yourself, so you won't be as intimidating and if you have an accessory that the guy can comment on, wear it! It's a good opening to start the conversation.

If you want to know more on common mistakes women make and some ideas to correct them check out The Six Biggest Dating Mistakes Women Make.

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1. Don't even mention timid guys to B, she is starting to get a little impatient with timid fellas. As we are sure many of you can relate!

Frugal is the New Black

B & L are sure you have seen those cute designer clutches, lusted over them for some time, and then thought, "Ugh. Maybe next time!"

Well, don't fret!

You can you can get similar cute clutches at places such as Target or, maybe more convenient, online at Target.com.

Pictured below is the Amanda Satin Foldover Clutch by Coach that retails for $298.00.




However, you could purchase the Merona Clutch in Black (pictured below) here at Target.com for $14.99 plus shipping and handling and put the extra $$$ you save towards a night out with the girls.



Both clutches are super cute! One is just more than $250.00 cheaper than the other.

Now you just have to ask yourself, do you want to spend the $298.00 on the Coach clutch or do you want to spend the $14.99 plus shipping and handling on the clutch from Target and spend that extra $250.00 doing something FABULOUS just for you?

Happy Birthday!

Wishing you a fabulous birthday, B!

xoxo

L

Thirsty Thursday

In honor of B's birthday tomorrow¹, enjoy an inspired cocktail this week!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY-TINI

Ingredients:

1 oz. vanilla vodka²

1 oz. Triple Sec

splash of pineapple juice

splash of cherry juice

ice

Instructions:

Fill shaker with ice.

Add the ingredients.

Shake well.

Pour contents of the shaker into a martini glass.³

Cheers!

---

1. Snaps!

2. B & L tend to favor "Three Olives" brand vodkas. Delish.
3. Sugar rims are always welcome!

What was I thinking?

Setting: L pulls into what she thinks is the Mazda dealership to get her 6 serviced.

L thinks to herself, "OK, this wasn't bad. There's parking up front, and oh, OK, I see the door I'm suppose to go through."

L gets out of her car, ::beep beep::, alarms the 6, and heads into check in for her appointment.

L: Hi, I have a 3:15 appointment.

Man behind the counter: Oh, yes, oil change and inspection?

L: Um, no..oil change, but a tire rotation, not an inspection.

Man: Ok, have a seat and I'll come over with some papers for you to sign. (He highlights, in hot pink!, L's appointment and takes her keys.)

L sits down in cozy leather seating and thinks to herself that this shouldn't be too bad. It was better than driving all the way down Rt. 9 to get to the other Mazda dealership.¹ This place is air conditioned and no one's around, she can definitely read for class tomorrow!

The man behind the counter comes to L, ripping off the temporary tag he placed on her key ring.

Man: Hah, um, this is my mistake, I didn't check your keys, but this is the Saturn dealership. You need to go next door to the Mazda dealership. Come on, I'll show you.

Man escorts L to Saturn's door, the same on she walked through, and yes, within eye shot is a door, clearly labeled "Mazda Service."

L: Ugh, do I have to drive all the way down the road and turn around?²

Man: Nope, nope, just drive through that row of cars you see right there and make a quick right and you'll be right there.³

L: Ohh..right, right. (Duh! L thinks to herself, ugh, you even read the door and thought, "hm. Saturn.") Hah, the one labeled "Mazda?"

L gets back in her car, zips around the dealership and sees that Saturn Man has directed her to the Volvo dealership.

She parks her car, gets out and starts walking towards a sign that says Mazda Service with an arrow pointing around the corner. A crass woman nearly catcalls L and yelps, "you can come in through here!" Here, being the door labeled, "Volvo Service."

Oooh-kay.

L enters the "Volvo Service."

Volvo Man: L?

L: Yes, oil change and tire rotation please. Sorry I'm a couple minutes late, I went to Saturn by mistake, checked in and everything!

Volvo Man: (Clearly not seeing the humor in L's mistake) Ok, lets see. (He clicks, clicks, onto the computer) Ok, you've never been here before?

L: (thinking: If I was here before, I clearly would not have gone into Saturn for my appointment.) Nope, just the one further down Rt. 9.

Volvo Man: Ok, no problem, let me walk you to the waiting area.

This, the real Mazda waiting room: Down-grade.

Major down-grade.

I thought the Mazda brand was suppose to be a little higher up the totem pole than Saturn, too?

I am directed to just a regular seating area. Cloth seats. With stacks of "Women's World" magazines and the Food Network blaring. There is no air conditioner. For the first day in what seems like a month, we actually have sunshine and it is HUMID out. (Read: L is sporting the begining of a 'fro.)

L gets up, and goes over to the elderly woman behind the counter.⁴

L: Um, do you happen to have an air conditioned waiting room?

Woman: Uhhh, no?? Just this.

L: Oh. (pouting) Ok... Saturn does. (L returns to her seat, defeated. And now sweating.)

Woman: You might want to move your seat out from under the window and sit next to the fake palm tree. There's some shade there.

L: (thinking to herself: If I'm sitting under a palm tree, I better have a margarita in my hand. Why don't you make yourself useful and blend me up one, ma'am. At this rate, add an extra shot over the top. Oh, and I like a sugar rim.) Hah, right. Out of the direct sunlight would be good.

So, after about an hour and fifteen minutes of sweating like a migrant worker, L's car is finally done.

Note to self: Drop off the vehicle (at the right location) next time.

---

1. Most of L's time is spent in the car it seems.

2. Like they, somehow inconvenienced, her.

3. He repeats this twice. Probably convinced L is a bimbo.

4. ...in a small town. Shout out to Pearl Jam!

Loves It, Hates It

Being schooled in trash, class, and "tru" trash: "Loves It!"

B was recently schooled in "trash," "class" and "tru trash" by her co-worker, C, and is currently trying to school L in the lingo.

"Trash:" not the classic "white trash" that people might automatically assume when you say something is trash. Rather, "trash" is something with a campy vibe to it. Everyone has trash in them and when that side comes out you should embrace it and love it! (Remember: we are not talking white trash here.)

"Tru trash" (-e left out intentionally!): something really trash. You don't hear a lot of class used except when you are being sarcastic and it's really trash.

Just be careful if you use "class." If you are joking around, make sure you display it that way and if you mean as a compliment make sure the person knows you think they are class. Be careful that the person does not take it as "klass" because that is actually a negative trash insult.

Now that you're in the know-- go and have fun with "trash," "class," and "tru trash"!

Remember it is NOT white trash just a campy vibe.

Hot Mess or Fashion Success?

Tight bottoms, loose flowing top, flat comfortable shoes for walking, oversized bag for your essentials: "Fashion Success!"

This girl did everything right!

She mixed dark bottoms with a clean, white linen top, and the bright red bag adds a necessary POP! of color.

Her proportions were done correctly, with tight bottoms that were matched with a loose fitting top.

Her flat shoes allow her to walk through the city without hobbling on the sidewalk.

B & L award snaps! for a job well done!

The Usual Suspects

The Absentee

The first week or so of classes, the lecture hall is full and everyone claims a seat. (Some professors even recommend that you keep the seat you sit in the first day, helping him/her to remember who's who and take an ariel view of attendees. And, we're creatures of habit.) You, a student, also become accustomed to where people sit and can easily notice when someone is absent.

You will spot "The Absentee" by the third or fourth class because he/she has already missed two of them.

When he/she is there, they make sure to over-volunteer, making sure the Professor knows his/her name.¹ Usually, "The Absentee" is right on point, too.

However, the absence of "The Absentee" is probably not a good idea when the Professor passes around a sign in sheet to keep a roster, and his secretary has made everyone name-tags.²

This is a personal shout-out to you, ZB! B & L better see you in class tonight! heh heh heh

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1. Possibly competing with "The Questionable Questionnaire."
2. We said we were back in the 8th grade with backpacks, lockers, and yes, even name-tags!

Hot Mess or Fashion Success?

A purse with applique circles attached to it that move when you wear it: "Hot Mess!"


This purse kind of reminds us of one of those pictures a child draws that only a select few could love (those being a parent, godparent, grandparent, aunt or uncle). You know, the one that would go on the refrigerator as soon as it is gifted to you, but as soon as company comes over the recipient would go: "And this picture little Johnny drew us. We love it so much, we just had to hang it up!"

Trust us, we totally understand being in that select group¹, but that doesn't mean you have to spend money on a bag that brings up those feelings described above, especially when it was made by someone who has no special connection to you.

Of course, you're entirely expected to wear the hand-painted dried macaroni necklace adorned with hand-painted clay beads and also display the clay pinch pot on your desk at work²!

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1. Just ask B about the random T sticker in her car one day if you want her to talk your ear off for about an HOUR about her nephew!

2. It was even put in the kiln with a glaze! Just for you!

What was I thinking?

Setting: B's college internship.

Boss man tells me that he was going downstairs and would be back shortly, but while he is gone he would lik a stack of files put away. (You're probably thinking "that's easy enough," trust me I was too!)

So, I start to put the files in the cabinet and I think to myself "Why hello there, this is super easy! I will have this done in No Time!"

I start to open up multiple draws in the filing cabinet, because, why waste time opening and shutting each draw one by one? Then, as I start to get my hopes up that the end is near, minus a stack of files on top the cabinet that I hadn't gone through yet, the cabinet starts to sway! Next thing I know, the cabinet is falling down towards me!

Oh, and those files on top? Well, they have fallen onto me and all over the floor!!

Turns out if you have more than one drawer open, and do not fill up the cabinet from the bottom up, it becomes top heavy and can easily tip over (lesson I quickly learned).

At the time I was panicking, "what if my boss heard all the noise going on upstairs? What would my boss think if he walked in and saw me attempting to hold up this filing cabinet with files scattered around on the floor?" PANIC!

Luckily, I was able to put the cabinet back in place, put the files away, email the sorority (did you think I would go five minutes without telling them what happened?), and eat lunch all before my boss got back.

Happy 4th!

We would like to wish our readers a very Happy Fourth of July!

Be sure to check back on Monday, July 6th for more of your favorite updates!

xoxo

B & L

And, please excuse us while we don't have any more posts for Friday.. B & L have seemed to have too much fun kicking off the long weekend @ Sidebar with a couple suits¹ after class with "Tricky Dick."

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1. You two skippers missed out on some good quotes!! Luckily we reviewed the lecture in the bar. And you're very welcome for the handout.

BOSTON UNCOMMON

As previously mentioned on this blog, B & L are all about proper outfit coordination, but completely matching your boy/girlfriend for a date (to the movies no less!) it is going a bit overboard.

Take note:


The girl wore all green: dress, flats, and earrings, while the boy wore a matching green polo.

We suppose if they were going to a Celtic's game or another sporting event (IF one of the colors is green) or if it were St. Patrick's Day we would let it slide, but, as previously mentioned this was at the movies and it is June (Read: No chance for St. Patty's celebrations, college events, and basketball season is over!).

Granted, there are times were coordinating an outfit is acceptable: themed parties¹; weddings; proms; pinnings or other formal affairs; however, a date to the movies in B & L's book is not considered a formal affair.

Each outfit alone could have been cute. The girl she probably should have mixed and matched some colors such as changing the flats for a pair of sandals - not green - and worn different earnings; together, however, the couple provides a complete overkill of green.

B & L should also note that this does NOT mean that you should not coordinate with your guy (or girl). When out, you should look like you're together. For instance, if you are going out to a nice restaurant with your guy, you should not be dolled up and your guy in a wrinkled t-shirt, jeans, and flip flops. You should look like you go together, but not that you had the "lets wear the same thing" conversation before you left the house.

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1. Oh, we miss college fraternity parties sometimes! Outside of college, we really don't see enough "Pimps and Hoes" or "Foam Parties" as we should!

Thirsty Thursday

A Goodnight Kiss

Ingredients:

4 oz. champagne

1 splash Campari

1 cube of sugar

1 drop Angostura Bitters

champagne flute

Instructions:

Put one drop of Angostura Bitters on the sugar cube and drop (carefully!) into the bottom of a champagne flute.

Add the champagne and top with the splash of Campari.

Cheers!

Hot Mess or Fashion Success?

Animal Print Overboard!

L felt like Steve Irwin (R.I.P.) this weekend at the Liberty Hotel, mate. She spotted this beauty from across the room, giving the animal connotation associated with "cougar" a whole new meaning.

"I stumbled across this Hot Mess and had to quickly remember where I was and how I got there-- just double checking to make sure Ike didn't take me on a safari...I don't do "animals"."¹

Dressing like a zebra or any other animal when it isn't Halloween: Hot Mess!

Animal print is a definite "Do" for your wardrobe, but B & L recommend to keep it simple. Think: an animal print pencil skirt, animal print stacked peep-toed heels, or an animal print cami under a cardigan. Keep the animal print matched with neutrals to balance out the outfit.²

Wearing it in one piece, head-to-toe, is just too much.

Ways for improvement: She could have opted for red heels, or a piece of red jewelry to break up the outfit (possibly a chunky red statement necklace).³ And, it was still breezy out, so a cardigan would have gone nicely over her sheath.

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1. Just ask L about the time he took her near a petting zoo. "Yuck."
2. You want to look classy, not trashy.

3. Also, she was located near the bar without a date. Having her arms crossed is horrible body language and makes her seem very unapproachable. She should read our Dating 101. And, what kind of cougar is not aggressive and on the prowl???

Dating 101

Don't make yourself too available.

Do you ever find a guy/girl more inciting when he/she doesn't pay attention to you? Have you thought you prefer the thrill of the chase when it comes to finding a new relationship?

When you first start dating someone, you like the thrill of the chase and the whole mystery that comes with discovering the new person. The longer the person has to chase you, and, thereby fall for you (remember this all within reason), it is more likely love may blossom. If the chemistry peaks too soon your emotions may not catch up and the relationship will eventually end.

Thus, don't make yourself too available. Enjoy the thrill and the mysterious part of discovering the new person you are interested in, even if it doesn't lead you to a "Forever After" it may lead to a great friendship.

To learn more, click here.